Honesty Hour: Soon You'll Understand...
If you didn't know by now, I'm a VERY BIG Sean Carter Fan...
Anyways, This Honesty Hour deals with 2 things.
Have you ever been faced with a situation where something may have went right, maybe even wrong and you didn't understand why at that moment? maybe sometime later, you found out why it happened the way it did?
OR
Have you ever been affected by someone or something, took through some pain, rain, or drama....focused in on it....and finally one day woke up with a sense of empowerment? clarity?
I Have. I Did.
Some Background...I believe I was born with the crippling effect of absolutely having to understand "WHY". It's one of the most exhausting things to deal with in life and I'm working on it. I've stated previously, "Sometimes You Just Have to Understand that there's SOME Things you'll NEVER understand" this is something I meditate on each day; In Due Time I believe, once we have matured enough- God will show us why this or why that did work/ didn't work. Attempting to figure it out before it's time is wasting time actually...plus your not so don't even bother. I've gotten to a point where I stop myself from attempting to defragment a situation and find a solution. God has his hands on me soo........Ain't No Need To Worry....
Getting back on the topic...
Last Night, I was doing my usual...writing down things that were stresses throughout the week, to pray on them, rip the sheet up and clear my plate. One of them has been a constant stress-or for the past few years.
My lack of truly understanding how love works.
Love, in regards to a relationship to me has always been one of those things like in the Disney Fairy Tale's. The Beautiful Princess get's her Prince...they live happily ever after...The End.
Experiencing Love....Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh NAH *In My Kyle from MW&K Voice*.
Love was ruthless....Love, done incorrectly hurt more than anything I've ever had hurt me before.
My assumption that the first time falling in love would be like the fairy tales I watched as a little girl was as false as ever. I've been attempting to "Understand" why things worked that way ever since my last brush with Love, done incorrectly and I keep hitting brick walls.
That was until last night.
My moment of clarity came in the form of Instagram. & that's all the details I'll say.
But in that event, I was overwhelmed with clarity, a sudden rush of peace on this "love" thing that I had been beating myself, week after week on. I finally was able to take a breath and say "Now I Understand God".
Love is not about a Prince or Princess...Love itself is imperfect. Just think of God's love for us...his sometimes sin driven children. We are imperfect...so our love is too. Love is unconditional (at least the real kind is) True Love is NEVER ending and isn't contingent on circumstances.
When you commit to loving somebody, you can't just love them when it's good...or i.e. Fairytale type. You have to consider that shit can get real! real quick! almost to the point of you despising that person. The love (if it's true) will always be there.
I understand that now.
I also understand that even when love is not reciprocated, if you truly love that person...you must continue to.
I also understand that when you love somebody, you can't LOSE your self, you MUST Love yourself.
and finally....when shit get's real.....if you truly love that person- you'll continue to. Even if it's from afar....while your focusing on you....and attempting to Love someone else.
This may not make any sense to a few people....but I hope at least 1 person got this message and realizes their not alone.
Anyways, This Honesty Hour deals with 2 things.
Understanding
and
Clarity.
Have you ever been faced with a situation where something may have went right, maybe even wrong and you didn't understand why at that moment? maybe sometime later, you found out why it happened the way it did?
OR
Have you ever been affected by someone or something, took through some pain, rain, or drama....focused in on it....and finally one day woke up with a sense of empowerment? clarity?
I Have. I Did.
Some Background...I believe I was born with the crippling effect of absolutely having to understand "WHY". It's one of the most exhausting things to deal with in life and I'm working on it. I've stated previously, "Sometimes You Just Have to Understand that there's SOME Things you'll NEVER understand" this is something I meditate on each day; In Due Time I believe, once we have matured enough- God will show us why this or why that did work/ didn't work. Attempting to figure it out before it's time is wasting time actually...plus your not so don't even bother. I've gotten to a point where I stop myself from attempting to defragment a situation and find a solution. God has his hands on me soo........Ain't No Need To Worry....
Getting back on the topic...
Last Night, I was doing my usual...writing down things that were stresses throughout the week, to pray on them, rip the sheet up and clear my plate. One of them has been a constant stress-or for the past few years.
My lack of truly understanding how love works.
Love, in regards to a relationship to me has always been one of those things like in the Disney Fairy Tale's. The Beautiful Princess get's her Prince...they live happily ever after...The End.
Experiencing Love....Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh NAH *In My Kyle from MW&K Voice*.
Love was ruthless....Love, done incorrectly hurt more than anything I've ever had hurt me before.
My assumption that the first time falling in love would be like the fairy tales I watched as a little girl was as false as ever. I've been attempting to "Understand" why things worked that way ever since my last brush with Love, done incorrectly and I keep hitting brick walls.
That was until last night.
My moment of clarity came in the form of Instagram. & that's all the details I'll say.
But in that event, I was overwhelmed with clarity, a sudden rush of peace on this "love" thing that I had been beating myself, week after week on. I finally was able to take a breath and say "Now I Understand God".
Love is not about a Prince or Princess...Love itself is imperfect. Just think of God's love for us...his sometimes sin driven children. We are imperfect...so our love is too. Love is unconditional (at least the real kind is) True Love is NEVER ending and isn't contingent on circumstances.
When you commit to loving somebody, you can't just love them when it's good...or i.e. Fairytale type. You have to consider that shit can get real! real quick! almost to the point of you despising that person. The love (if it's true) will always be there.
I understand that now.
I also understand that even when love is not reciprocated, if you truly love that person...you must continue to.
I also understand that when you love somebody, you can't LOSE your self, you MUST Love yourself.
and finally....when shit get's real.....if you truly love that person- you'll continue to. Even if it's from afar....while your focusing on you....and attempting to Love someone else.
This may not make any sense to a few people....but I hope at least 1 person got this message and realizes their not alone.
Thank God for Granting Me this Moment of Clarity.
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